Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Just being makes me itchy.


Well, it is happening and I need to fight it. I knew that once we were mostly settled in and comfortable with where we were I would start to get the itch to seek employment faster than I wanted. Looks like just being me, makes me itchy to be something else. I promised myself and my family that I would not start looking until September. I know I need the recovery from the heartbreaking move, I know I need to get Anya feeling more connected in her community, I know I need to get to know my new friends at our new church (and there are lots!!) I know I know I know..
I have to be honest and say I feel slightly embarrassed that I have such an amazing place to do this in, not many people have the opportunity to stop work and figure things out. Sure there is a huge cost to that but I know God has called me to do this and I need to honour this opportunity. What I think is happening is that my old definition of who I am is wanting to be validated. That somehow I am feeling less than valuable without a position. I knew this was going to happen but I did not expect it to happen this quickly.. after all I have only been on the island for 13 days. So I write this blog as a way to challenge myself to slow down, to stop and take the moments right now for what they are, a gift from God. A gift where He has given fewer distractions in order that I might see Him better and in turn know who I am in Him more clearly.So for the next little while I am led back to the verse that was so clearly given to the MacPhails as we contemplated our transition.

Jeremiah 29:11-13
For I know the plans I that I have for you declares the Lord,
plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope.
Then you will call upon Me and I will listen to you.
And you will seek me and find me when you search for Me with all your heart.

I will continue to push aside my restless itchiness of just being, and sit with the uncomfortableness that comes with being me. I will choose to call upon the Lord and not the want ads, I will seek God with my heart and I know I will continue to find Him for He promises to listen. shine on my friends

2 comments:

  1. Allie, your post today was so beautiful and lifted me up at just the right moment... we are bringing Michaela home at the end of next week, praise the Lord!

    As for you, Bryn and Anya, what a joy and a blessing that our amazing technology allowed me to find you almost instantly upon thinking to myself, "I wonder if Bryn and Allie have gotton settled in Nassau?" I am so inspired... Remain hopeful in the Lord as I believe with all my heart, soul and mind that He does indeed have a plan for each and every one of us!

    May God shower your beautiful family with an abundance of blessings and every grace to sustain you through your transition.

    God bless,
    Jacqueline

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  2. AWESOME Blog Allie!! WOW... sometimes I can get so overwhelmed focusing on my current situation and not on what lies ahead... what God's plan and purpose is... today... you have helped me refocus... Thank you SO MUCH... Reminds me of : Philippians 3:13-15 (NLT)
    13 No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, 14 I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us.

    Thank you again ALLIE!!!!! AWESOME BLOG, God Bless you & please keep sharing!!!

    Love Andrea

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