Today was a liberating day. For the past 5 weeks we had 4 massive tables full of things that at some point had accumulated into our overstuffed home. First they were for purchase during our house content sale, then they were free to anyone who could carry it, then we shoved things into the bags, purses or cars of our unsuspecting guests just to start getting rid of stuff. And now they are gone!!! Last night I packed all the leftovers in to 5 huge boxes, and three bags. This morning I left them on the curb for a charity to pick them up. I did some errands and voila, when I arrived home. They were gone. Such a good feeling. Such a great feeling! I had been overwhelmed for 5 + weeks with the amount of things we have accumulated over the years.These were all things that had been forgotten, ignored or not used. The sheer amount was humiliating and I am so pleased to be rid of it. I feel cleansed, free and simple (no comments on my intellect please) It feels so good that Bryn and I have sworn to each other to live from here on in, a relatively simple life by not accumulating a lot of things. Right now that seems easy to do, in a year, I will need a reminder, please mark your calendar to do that for me. I was wondered if, once this stuff is gone will I miss it? Will I regret giving it away? I am sure there will be one or two things that I remember and miss but the reality is,I could not tell you the exact contents of those boxes I packed merely 24 hours ago so I think I am safe. I believe that is a good sign. The other thing I am noticing as we shed our belongings is that my life is more free, less weighed down which allows me to enjoy the more important things in my life. I was sitting in my almost empty living room on a couch surrounded by bare walls and floors and was able to truly reflect on where God is in my life right now. I am sure that someone without my ADD could do that in a full room, but that moment for me was awesome. Also, last night I tucked my daughter into bed in a bedroom that has only furniture and packed boxes right now. She is down to 4 of her favourite bears and 3 books until we get to Nassau. We were so content, I needed nothing else but that simple moment to cherish. I like being simple, it fits me and I just wanted to share that with you today.Shine on my friends.
It was when I found myself in the line up at a big name box store buying computer ink cartridges that I was overcome by the need (okay want) to purchase a tube of Jelly Belly jelly beans. I had a long drive to work ahead of me and thought I would appreciate the distraction, little did I know what new discoveries lay ahead of me. I was unaware, but in that tube were both Friends and Foes. For those who are unaware, Jelly Belly's label themselves as the first gourmet jelly bean, they have countless flavours of various tasty sensations, so many in fact that each package of beans comes with what I call a flavour menu! I popped the top off the tube and poured out 4 beans. I put the first one in and savoured the experience, it was Sizzling Cinnamon bean..HOT DARN!!! this one turned out to be my favourite of the day, what a great start. Next, lemon lime, ZING! Then bubble gum, POP then cream soda YAHOO! I was on a role, each bean brought such excitement of flavour. I had made new four friends in those beans and I was so joyful!
Then it happened, WHAMMO.. toasted coconut. To be fair the concept is decent but once it mingles with human saliva and coats the taste buds it is more akin to licking your fingers after applying sun lotion. Totally unacceptable. But I decided that in order to rid my mouth of sun lotion flavour I ought to try again. So I poured out 3 more. The first was brown so I thought maybe just maybe a chocolate bean, but no..it was coffee. Folks that flavour needs to stay in a cup. It must never be hardened and formed into a sugary bean shape and yes I see the irony that coffee beans are actually real but I think they would have been more palatable than this little brown curiosity. Next two beans brought with them an overwhelming yawn, they were just okay but not spectacular. The first yawn was a variation of something strawberry the second was boring old orange. Blah Blah blah. Foe's had made their presence in the tube known, and they were powerful, and according to the menu, I knew I had not yet encountered the most deadly of foes, the black licorice flavour. EWWWW! A flavour so strong it takes 2-3 friend beans to counter attack the assault on the taste buds.
Fearing what flavour was next I began to visual inspect each bean before consumption. I was so afraid of these unsuspecting foes that even my darling sizzling cinnamon was looked at with suspicion causing me to wonder if it was a pomegranate in disguise. The result, I never regained the original joy of the first four beans. Paranoia, suspicion and lingering bad tastes even tainted my enjoyment of the next sizzling cinnamon bean.
Why the story, well it occurred to me that some of you would like a lighter story for a change. But more than that, I wondered if I was doing the same to people and experiences that I did to my jelly belly beans. I used to dive right in and savour life but after a few bad experiences I find that I hesitate suspiciously and examine carefully, trying to detect any foe like qualities before enjoying it. Yes, even things that I wholeheartedly love are often pushed aside for a later date so that I might feel safer or more ready to enjoy it. I want to savour life like I did with the first four beans, I miss that energy and excitement.
Sure I might encounter a foe once in a while but that is life. Much like a tube of beans, life also has blah moments, unpalatable moments and moments that make you cringe (black licorice). Life is worth the risk and now faced with the onslaught of a whole bunch of new people and experiences II find myself wanting to actively seek out and savour the awesomeness of what life can bring in Nassau. So onward I go, ready for the new!
